Thursday, May 19, 2022

Welcoming A Guest Is Different Than Taking Attendance

I have been very encouraged by the number and frequency of first-time visitors that seem to be finding their way to Celebration these days.

I have also been stumped about how we - that is to say "All-Of-Us-That-Make-Up-Celebration" - can better identify, welcome, and engage with these first-time visitors. It is a heartache for me to sit in my office on Monday with a recollection of a new face "sitting about two-thirds back and on my left and in front of BLANK."  Did they bump my fist after the service?  Did I see them at coffee??  And I can't answer my own questions.  Yikes!

Most people who have spent years going to church are accustomed to "passing that name pad thing."  I thought about that and remembered my own experience with those as a worshipper and a pastor.  I dug into some research to get a sense of what others are finding.  In a nutshell, fewer and fewer people are willing to "sign in."  This is especially true of those who are "just visiting," or "checking things out" for a first-time, the very people you would like to have contact with.

What I'm realizing more and more, is that there is a critical difference between "taking attendance" and "welcoming a guest."  The "Welcome Pad" sign-in method is just taking attendance.  At best.

Taking attendance helps keep up with those who already belong or identify with us.  Welcoming a guest opens a relational door for those who would feel "outside" on their first Sunday.  It actively invites them to take a next step "in."

Taking attendance helps us see "who of us is missing."  Welcoming a guest helps us ask, "Who is the Father bringing?" or "Who is the Father calling us to serve?"

A ministry mentor once told me that, "You want your worship space and service space to say to a guest: We are glad you came, and we actually thought before-hand about how to make you welcome."  We had you in mind - or someone like you - even before you arrived.  Welcome!  You are the answer to our prayers and preparation.

Have you ever been to one of those, "new, seeker-sensitive-startup-type-churches"?  I'm not willing to go "hook, line and sinker" with everything associated with a church like that, but I do observe two things: They don't pass the "Welcome Binder" to connect with visitors, and they typically do a great job of identifying, welcoming and engaging their first-time visitors.

I am pretty certain that there is no system, plan or program we can put in place that will solve this dilemma. It will take the people of Celebration being involved.  A good system for welcoming can support people doing the welcoming, but it cannot replace them or run without them.  It is "insiders" that have the power to make "outsiders" feel welcome.  The Father uses people to communicate and demonstrate His grace. This is so central to the Gospel that God Himself became a people to make the Gospel possible.  A good system for welcoming can support people doing the welcoming, but it cannot replace them or run without them.

So pray with me.  Let's talk and brainstorm.  If the Father is bringing people, how does He want to motivate and equip us to welcome them with His love?

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Does this get some thoughts and questions going in your mind?  As always, feel free to make contact with me - you can add a comment below or through the Harderwyk Ministries office - and let's talk.

Perhaps you'd also be interested in this post: "How the Stand and Greet Time Disappeared in Churches and How To Replace It."  CLICK HERE

Or even "The Amazing Shift of Four "Front Doors" in Churches" - CLICK HERE

Wednesday, May 11, 2022

Both Content & Delivery Matter When The Church Answers Questions

Looks like a summer of church controversy is headed our way with regard to LGBTQ+ issues.  I see the United Methodist Church melting down, the Reformed Church in America planning for a gracious division and the CRCNA nervously approaching a major position paper all on this one topic.  So how to navigate both inside our local churches, our institutions and our communities as well as the outside world that will evaluate our answers?

As the pastor of a congregation of real people, I have been praying and considering this very question.  In that process, I have come to conceive of the challenge as a matter of getting two very tricky things right at the same time.  Content and Delivery, I would say.  As a local church leader, I want to get right both the Content of my response and the delivery of my response, in order to serve my people well and make the Gospel clear both to us and to those onlookers who will be listening.


Content

This would be the answers to questions that people have, the guidance and counsel I give and the decisions that I and other leaders will invariably have to make.  What will the substance of my response in these areas be?

For my part, I want to make sure any Content I have is faithful to the Scripture and respectful of the confessions of my church which are the history of God and His people.  I will need to understand the questions that my neighbors are asking, and the answers, often different than mine, that others are offering them.  I will want to be clear and understandable in what I say.

But as a follower of Jesus, there is, in fact, content to be faithful to.  I want to get that right both for the sake of my listeners and to be faithful to my Redeemer.  There are some answers that are simply not mine to make up.  I can only deliver them.


Delivery

One of the things that fascinates me most about the Jesus we meet in the Gospels is how able He is to welcome and interact with such a divergent - even conflicting - collection of people.  The sick, the sinner and the self-righteous all feel welcome to engage with him.  He Himself WAS the message, and He never changed that with anyone.  Some would eventually scheme and kill Him for that very message, but He never drove them away, and at least at the beginning, all of those people would seek Him out.

Since His content never changed with the audience, I think what made the way clear for people to engage Him is what I will call "Delivery."  There was something in the way Jesus interacted with people, both before and after He actually spoke, that made them want to seek Him out.

He was a good listener.  He never shamed anyone.  There was an amazing wisdom and clarity of insight in His words.  He was "no respecter of persons," is one expression used of Him.  All that and more, they willingly came to Him.

I am sad to admit, that such has not always been the case with my interactions.  For a variety of reasons, that I seem slow to come to grips with honestly, people who are different than me find it safer to run or fight than to engage.

So, this Delivery element is important.  I think we are called to not only deliver the Content that Jesus would, but also with the Delivery that Jesus would.  If I get the Content right, I still miss the mark if I don't get the Delivery right as well.  

Now, it's also true that if I don't get the Content right, I can't make up for that lack by getting the Delivery right.

Content and Delivery are a Both/And proposition and not an Either/Or.   At least if we are going to be faithful to the life and message that we experience in the Gospel of Jesus.


An Example

The Evangelical Presbyterian Church, the denomination in which I am ordained, has attempted to work this "Content & Delivery" approach out on the subject of LGTBQ+ questions in a way that has been very helpful for my own guidance, prayer and ministry.  We have a "Position Paper on Human Sexuality" that presents the "Content" - CLICK HERE - concisely with an abundance of Scripture references for further study.  That was followed with a "Pastoral Letter on Human Sexuality" that focused on the "Delivery" or better yet, pastoral ministry side.  CLICK HERE for that paper - and note that it is nearly ten times longer!


Reflections on The Human Sexuality Report Coming to the CRCNA General Synod in June of 2022

Part of the approaching tumult of the summer that I mentioned in the beginning is related to the paper on Human Sexuality being presented for consideration and adoption to this summer's General Synod of the Christian Reformed Church in Grand Rapids.  CLICK HERE to see an Executive Summary (12 pages) and CLICK HERE to look at the full report of 176 pages.

My brief reflections: The committee that was tasked with producing this report was given a challenging charge and overall, in my mind, they did a commendable job.  They certainly invested amazing effort.  I would support it, if I were a part of the CRC.

That said, it seems very long on Content - 176 pages.  Lots of words - even good words - on an explosive topic seem like a setup for confusion and contention, particularly to the outside world.  

There are sections on "Pastoral Care" that would speak to the Delivery component in my model.  Still, it is the Delivery side that churches have been weakest in the past, that is where our mistakes cause real pain and even harm, and that is where most people - this is certainly the case for me - find it hardest to represent the Gospel well.

At Harderwyk, we are using the Grace & Truth 1.0 material by Preston Sprinkle gather people in a small group setting to reflect and consider how we navigate conversations and relationships related to LGBTQ+ people and issues.  CLICK HERE for a link to a previous post on this.


Here's a few questions:  

Which of those two - Content or Delivery - is it your more natural response to the questions of our culture?  Which of the two is hardest for you to live up to with your neighbors?  Where do you most need the work of the Holy Spirit  if you are to be more like Jesus in communicating with the people you encounter?

If this has raised some questions for you, feel free to leave a comment or, better yet, let's find a way to talk.  Catch me after worship on Sunday perhaps, or call the Harderwyk Ministries office during the week and we can arrange a time to sit down together that works for us both.